the crime comes last of all

an exercise in blurring the truth.

Friday, December 23, 2005

he's got leather and cheap tattoos, scars all over his face.

Those white, scruffy-ass ganstas, with their sideways trucker hats and their manpris and their three-day stubble, whose parents make more money than the rappers they idolize. Aside from the obvious, what have they got that she doesn't, to attract such aggressively hot women? Is it money? Is it the rap-culture image? Is sexual attractiveness inversely proportional to the number of times one has bathed that week?

Fountains of Wayne - Leave the Biker

Sunday, December 11, 2005


You hate the way she smells. You don't care for the way she tastes - bland, yet acrid, trying too hard to be demur and cute when it's just sex. But what do you care about? Orgasms. "Lots and lots of orgasms."

Sunday, December 04, 2005

let me dirty up your mind. . .the queerest of the queer.

You - it - she. . .we feel that the world is more complicated than ones and zeroes. Existence is not quantifiable, it's not reducibe to logic.

Things can be explained by logic - things, phenomena, events. But something about reducing everything - why we exist, or the nature of life - into a form that can be explained in small, deductive steps, insults her on a level so basic it's hard to articulate. It's not a disagreement, it's just a gut feeling of "no." A small part of her is just railing against the transparency of the logic, refuses to accept it as correct despite the fact that there are no holes, there are no incorrect deductive leaps to be teased out.

Yes, perception is a biological response to a given, constant stimulus. If 550nm hits the cones on the back of my retina, it will do so in the same way in your retina. It will travel through the same optic pathways, through the same subcortical structures. But to say that we see the same colour is wrong. That colour is subjective. The way your cortex is wired to define that wavelength is different that the way hers might be. Brains are not identical, they're just similar, and the complexities of the structures of the neurons in two visual cortices are vast. They are not "the same." They're close. But one might have slightly different spine densities on the dendrites of one cortical neuron that fires in response to that wavelength. And those two spines might mean the difference between "blue" and "violet," or "navy" and "black."

Everything is subjective. Deductive logic is subjective. It's subject to the acceptance of every claim made, and each claim is based on a belief that it is true. This belief is rooted in further deductions. And so on. Perceived observations are subjective. Deductive claims are based on percieved observations. Therefore, deductive claims are subjective. Your logic doesn't exist.

There is no god. Is this faith?

Garbage - Queer